Intervention, or family intervention, is a carefully planned process to help a person with a substance use problem enter treatment. It generally involves a group of people, such as family and friends of the individual, with the help of a qualified interventionist working to convince their loved one they need help.
How Does An Intervention Work?
There is a general simplified process that anyone can apply to their situation, which will be detailed below. However, the best advice we can offer is to hire a professional interventionist. There are certified intervention professionals nationwide, local addiction therapists, counselors, psychologists, or even a family doctor who could have experience. Bring someone in to take the point, increasing the chance of a successful commitment to treatment that day.
The Intervention Process
Based on our research and experience working with Professional Interventionists there is an exact series of steps that should be taken. These intervention steps should be taken in exact sequence to greatly increase the chance of success. Here is a list of the most essential steps anyone can take to plan and execute a successful family intervention:
Finding the Right Treatment Program
The very first step in performing an intervention is finding the right treatment program that is best suited for your loved one. This involves understanding your addicted loved one’s needs and the family’s financial resources. Research programs offering tailored care, such as medical detox, therapy, and aftercare. Consider the facility’s approach, location, length of treatment and success rates. Check the family’s insurance coverage and payment options to determine affordability. Look for accredited programs with licensed professionals and positive reviews. The more information you gather, the better because you can begin to narrow down treatment options suited to their needs. Oftentimes, facilities will have Certified Intervention Professionals they work with as well.
Planning the Intervention
Develop a detailed plan with a family member or friend or work with a qualified professional. Consider this the planning group where you would begin looking at who would attend, where it would take place, and thinking of a contingency plan if they say no to treatment. their living situation, whether they are working, and who they have stayed in communication with the most. Form a solid intervention team of four to six people that will not cave to the individual’s emotions and will not enable the person with an addiction. The planning group, with or without the help of a professional interventionist, forms this team. The team then sets the date and location where they would present a rehearsed message and a structured plan. This is generally where an intervention professional would take point to ensure the intervention does not deviate.
Preparing for the Intervention
Preparing for an intervention takes thoughtful planning and teamwork. Start by having each person write a heartfelt letter expressing love, concern, and the desire to help. Anticipate objections the individual may raise, and prepare responses to address them calmly. Choose a private, distraction-free setting where everyone can focus. Ensure all team members are united in their message and approach, staying prepared for any emotional reaction.
Executing the Intervention
Executing an intervention requires structure, compassion, and a unified approach. The process begins with assembling the group and preparing the setting, ensuring a calm and distraction-free environment. The intervention leader, often a professional, introduces themselves and explains the purpose of the gathering. Letters are read in a pre-determined order, with impactful speakers placed strategically to convey heartfelt concern.
Performing the Intervention
On the day of intervention double check with the treatment facility to confirm bed availability and ensure they know the intervention time. Arrange transportation in advance and pack a bag with essentials to avoid delays. Hold a pre-intervention meeting to rehearse the plan and keep everyone aligned. Practice staying calm, compassionate, and firm during the conversation. Hope for a positive outcome, but be ready to face challenges. With preparation and persistence, you can make a meaningful difference in your loved one’s life.
Have a ‘Plan B’ with a specific outcome. The goal obviously is to get them to treatment that day, yet they may refuse. If this occurs, each member of the intervention team must decide on specific actions they will take, such as cutting them off financially, kicking them out of the house, removing them from their job, etc. Whatever the action is, stick to it and do not deviate from it.
You have to put just enough pressure on the addicted loved one so that going to treatment is the better of the two options. Oftentimes, that’s what it takes to get a person over the hump to make the decision to accept help.
Be Emotionally Prepared for Anything
Confronting a loved one with an addiction is an emotionally charged situation, and they may not accept the treatment plan at that exact moment. Emotionally prepare yourself for either the outcome of accepting help now or later. We always tell families to remain hopeful for positive change because the intervention process begins to set that positive change in motion.
What happens in those first five minutes when you walk into a room with the family and the person who needs help? | P2R Podcast
With decades of intervention experience, Bobby Newman walks through the critical first five minutes of an intervention, revealing how hours of preparation, non-confrontational letters of care, and strategic planning—including who speaks last for maximum emotional impact—successfully disarm resistance and lead to acceptance.
Transcript
Marcel Gemme: Now walk us through what happens in those first five minutes when you walk into a room with the family and the person that needs help.
Bobby Newman: Well, you know, the first five minutes, I mean, there’s a lot of preparation that goes into that first five minutes. I mean, we spend hours and we even do sometimes even role playing before we get in front of the person. We’re gonna go through, you know, there’s six steps to an intervention. You know, the first is deciding that you’re gonna do something regardless of any pushback that you get from anybody, including the person, you know, including the other family members.
Then there’s planning, know, who’s going to be involved, where it’s going to be, know, when it’s going to be. And then there’s preparation. You’re going to list out all the objections the person is going to have. They’re going to throw all kinds of problems at you, reasons they can’t go. I mean, you have to have a solution for all of those things. You have to be prepared for, you know, you prepare for the worst and you hope and pray for the best, but you prepare for the worst case. So when we go in, everybody knows what to do.
And it doesn’t mean that it has to take a long time to do those things. Usually, you know, I even plan them out to where the person, we want the person to sit, we want the family to sit, we want to know who’s going to be walking in the door and I’m usually the last one to walk in. And so the person themselves will usually be, you know, there and they see the certain folks together and a lot of times people are coming in from out of town or whatever.
And so they see him and they’re like, what’s going on? And then they see me and sometimes people, you know, I just walk in and they’re like, they know everybody and then I’ll walk in and I say, hi, my name is Bobby. I’m a friend of the family and you’re just want to let you know that your family loves you very much. And they have a few things they would like to say to you. And then usually the person is like looking like their mouth is kind of there like they’re I’ll shake their hand with and I’ll be there and I said could would you give us a few minutes and usually they say yes and then we set out and we go right into it.
And we already have it planned out to where the first person that’s going to read, we have prepared letters, letters of love and care, there’s no blame, this is not an opportunity to attack a person, we’re just basically going to start out sharing very fond memories, and kind of what we’re noticing, you know, lately and what we want for that person.
We tell them how good they are. And, you know, but we also in the back, we’ve already prepared ourselves for any possible reaction that they’re going to have. But we want to overwhelm the person with really positive feeling of that these people really care. And usually that that will disarm the person.
But if they do react, we have to be ready for that. If they do react negatively, we have to, know, some people go, “well, they’re going to get mad. I’m afraid they’re going to get mad.” Well, there’s a good chance of that, you know? So we have to be ready and we have to be willing to hold our ground. It doesn’t mean we’re going to attack. We’re not there to do anything physical, but at the same time we have to be, if we let them push us back and, you know, and, don’t hold our ground, things are just going to get worse. And so we have to be willing to weather the storm and calmly communicate with this person to be able to convince them that, you know, a lot of times people will tell me, “well, I don’t have a drug problem.” And it’s obvious that they do, but I don’t even, I’ll say, “Okay.” And I’ll say, “Well, how’s your life going?” And the person will say, “My life sucks.” Okay, “Well, what about your life sucks?” And then it’s like, and they’ll tell me and then there could be a number of things and I’d say “Okay, well if I could help you with that, then would you be interested?” “Yeah, how are you gonna help me that?” “Well…” and then we start listing out ways of how we’re gonna help the person.
So you know and It always boils down to, well the first thing we got to do is you know, yeah, we want to solve that problem, but the first thing we got do is we got to get off these drugs. We can’t really do anything if we can’t get off the drugs.
Marcel Gemme: Totally, totally.
Bobby Newman: “Yeah, I guess you’re right.” Okay, good. Well, let’s do that. So that’s what the first five minutes is, again, well planned and we walk in and we go right into it. But then I always tell the family within five to seven minutes, we’re reading our letters to the person. We have them planned out, usually three to four letters. And my approach is to always have the person who’s gonna have the most emotional impact on the individual read last.
Marcel Gemme: Makes sense, yeah.
Bobby Newman: And I’ve had very hard cases. You know, guy sold cars up in, I think it was Minnesota, and he was a character. He was definitely a character, but you know, he’s in the car business and he’s very outgoing, very boisterous, and you know, and they just, there’s no way we’re gonna control this guy. So we set out and he’s got a big family and, you know, everybody wrote a letter, but only three or four of them actually read their letters because it could get pretty long and you know, go on too long and we get all the way around to his daughter. He had an 18 year old daughter. So she was the last one and she pulls out her letter and she starts, she clears her throat and he said, he threw his hands up, said, “Whatever you guys want me to do.” We said, “we want you to go to rehab.” He said, okay. Cause that girl really meant a lot to him and he wanted to, so was, it was like: “I’m done. Yeah, whatever you guys want.” And he went and it was no problem. And the family was shocked. They were like, “Whoa, we didn’t expect that.” But, but, you know, it’s just preparation!
Marcel Gemme: Yeah, that’s amazing. I think the key word is really “care” in there. And you know, like I said, it’s like to put in more pressure than the drug is putting on the person.
Bobby Newman: Yes, yeah exactly you have to be willing to do that and you know it comes in various ways because if you’re not, the drugs are gonna win. And the individual that we know and love is not in control anymore. And so we have to help them, you know, we’ve got to help them with that demon on their back. I call it a gorilla on the back. We have to help them with that and they’re depending on us to do that.
Marcel Gemme: No, absolutely.
What if They Refuse Help?
If resistance arises, the group remains united and firm, using positivity before escalating to consequences. Distractions, exits, and isolating attempts by the individual are managed effectively to maintain focus. Once agreement is reached, plans for immediate transportation to the treatment facility are executed without delay.
The Consequences of Refusing Help
Delivering consequences during an intervention is an essential step when a loved one refuses treatment. It requires clarity, unity, and unwavering determination from the intervention team. Each team member must outline specific, non-negotiable consequences that will occur if the individual refuses help, emphasizing the seriousness of the situation.
Consequences should be based on actions within the team’s control, such as ending financial support, removing access to housing, or limiting contact until they seek treatment. These should be communicated calmly, without anger, and with a focus on love and concern. Avoid empty threats; only state what you are willing and prepared to enforce.
The goal is not to punish but to help the person understand the gravity of their situation and motivate change. Reinforce that these boundaries are for their safety and well-being, and that support will resume once they agree to treatment. Remaining united and firm ensures the intervention’s message is clear and effective.
The above is only done as a last resort and after considerable effort is taken to convince the person to accept help.
Learn How to Successfully Do an Intervention
Learning how to conduct drug or alcohol intervention is essential for families facing addiction. Newman Intervention Services offers an online course that walks families through the intervention process in about two hours, covering how to assemble an intervention team and select a treatment facility.
What’s the single most important factor that makes an intervention successful? | P2R Podcast
Intervention specialist Bobby Newman, who achieves a 90% success rate, explains that unified family collaboration is the critical factor in successful interventions, as most individuals struggling with addiction recognize they need help despite initial resistance.
Transcript
Marcel Gemme: You have 90 % success rate with interventions. What’s the single most important factor that makes an intervention successful?
Bobby Newman: Well, having the family members operate as a unit, I would say is the… you know, usually a lot of dysfunction, there’s the family dynamic, and people are at odds and one person has one idea and another person has another idea or maybe other people are emotionally affected and you know, and putting a proactive team together versus a reactive dispersed group of people that are, you know, and that’s, it’s just chaotic. And so getting the family to operate together is very important.
Because most people want help and they find it hard even though they may scream at the top of their lungs “I’m not going to treatment!”, that doesn’t necessarily mean that they deep down they don’t know that they need help and if you do it the correct way with the correct approach you know you can have you know most likely they work. Like you said ninety percent of the time more often than not even when people are you know somewhat unwilling at first.
So surprisingly, you get various responses, but you have to be willing to confront it because the truth is that their life could be at stake.
Marcel Gemme: No, absolutely. You’re so right. I’ve experienced it a lot working with families.
Expert Advice to Consider for Interventions
- Coordinate closely with the treatment center to ensure quick admission, including confirming bed availability and admission timing.
- Choose an intervention location that minimizes the individual’s ability to leave easily.
- Exclude anyone from the intervention team who might enable the addicted person or cause unnecessary conflict.
- If there are family members who enable, do your best to handle them by not enabling the addiction if the person refuses help.
- Time the intervention carefully to avoid moments when the individual is under the influence of substances if at all possible.
- Appoint one point of contact for team coordination and communication.
- Stick to the intervention script, maintaining focus and clarity without unnecessary additions.
- When needed, consult or work with addiction professionals to guide the process.
- If, after considerable effort, the person still refuses, stick to the consequences as laid out in the intervention. If you can do this, the chances of your loved one eventually accepting help increase dramatically.
